I write better when I smoke. Don’t ask me to reduce it to a science.

Heart Evangelista’s tits


Now that Heart Evangelista has gotten herself engaged to perpetual man-child Chiz (even his nickname is lost in a timewarp) Escudero, the chances of the rest of humanity ever seeing her tits have plummeted to almost zero. Such a shame, considering how seemingly well formed her chestal assets are.


Oh well.



Filed under: sex, ,

Popularity shouldn’t cut the cheese

A lot of people rhapsodize over the losses sustained by artistas in the last election; pundits – even those who ought to know better – were quick to praise the ‘maturity’ of the Filipino voter.


The Filipino voter merely traded one kind of celebrity – the showbiz kind – for another – the political kind. And even that was only possible because the political celebrities deliberately used showbiz-esque tactics to make an impact on the masses.

If the Filipino voter were truly mature, people like Chiz Escudero would never have won. Or Sonny Trillanes. After all, what doe these people bring to the table aside from their tried and tested ability to orate in mellifluous monotones and throw tantrums?

And now Escudero is contemplating a run at the presidency in 2010? Come ON.

His is one of the blankest records in Congress; he made Senator solely on the strength of his anti-Gloria posturing; and now, before he has even done anything significant in the Senate – apart from introducing slim fit jeans into the plenary session hall – he’s gunning for the highest office in the land? On what fucking grounds? Quite possibly, the fact that he was number 2 ranked. What a shitty world.

This is proof that even as these politicians masturbate each other – and the civil society types – about how they’re riding the wave of a mature vote, they don’t really believe in what they’re saying. Popularity still counts as the highest good in this political arena, and substance ranks maybe 36th.

Don’t get me wrong, popularity is important. But in a situation – like Chiz’s – where popularity makes up 95 to 99% of the politician’s appeal, isn’t it fair to ask the politician whether he doesn’t feel like he’s shortchanging the nation? It’s kinda like a salesman selling you a vacuum cleaner he knows won’t suck up much dirt but looks good doing it. However way you cut it, it’s a cheat.

Filed under: 2010 watch, , , , , ,

Model Senators

Model Senators? HAH! Not quite, bitches. More like Senators who model so they can get a leg up on the competition the next time they have to get themselves re-elected. Who are they kidding, right?

I mean, with net worths running in the multi-millions (assets minus liabilities!), they can’t possibly be doing the ads for the money. Nor can they possibly be doing it for any legitimate cause, as Pia Cayetano and Dick Gordon so blithely insist.

Hello? Doing an ad for soap is a “legitimate advocacy of public health, hygiene and safety?” Not when you’re being the push-man for pay, Big Blue. The same goes for you, Prognathous Pia – even if you looked so pretty while saying “I personally lent my name to a good cause, which is saving water.”

The problem, you see, is that whatever good cause there is in your ad campaigns is soured by the cynicism of it all. If you truly wanted to advocate public health or saving water or whatever, you can just as easily do so without telling people to buy this product or that. After all, there are other soaps that do the same thing, and there are other products that help save water – why single out a particular brand? The answer is pretty simple and very accessible to anyone with one-quarter of a brain: so that brand can plaster your face all over town and saturate the air waves with your face and voice; in other words, to build up your presence in the national consciousness. The money is secondary.

In fact, I’m willing to bet my great-grandmother’s wedding ring that these pols get unreasonably low pay for the use of their image. Maybe they should be asked to disclose their modeling contracts so that the public can see if there really is an ex-deal going on. Of course, at the end of the day, it doesn’t matter how much they’re paid. Whether large talent fees or small, the end result is their taking advantage of the marketing machinery of the brands they’re pushing.

Obviously, there’s nothing blatantly criminal about this kind of cynical and mercenary manipulation of the public mind. But it does skate too close to being morally reprehensible because it is both a dishonest act and a circumvention of the law that elected public officials have the sworn duty to abide by.

Filed under: 2010 watch, politics, , , , , , , , ,